Apr 28, 2023·edited Apr 28, 2023Liked by Kathleen Sykes
It must be something in the air.
Recently I ventured into the dangerous turf of discussing some downdsides of the sexual revolution on my page and in discussions elsewhere.
I've had a few women give positive feedback, and more than a few telling me to mind my own business. Very few men have the courage to enter these discussions. I try to keep it on the clinical side. As always I promote nature as the boss and our attempts to subvert the laws of nature as hazardous and usually harmful in the Long term.
No one ever discusses the side effects of birth control. I went there and I am glad I did.
One of my more controvercial points is that if there were no birth control, women and men would be much more selective when choosing a mate.
Even more outlandish is the idea that if women were more often pregnant they (and their mates) would get a break from the estrus cycle, including the dreaded PMS. Surprisingly some women liked that comment!
On the financial front, my CPA says that having both partners working is not good tax strategy. Accounting is not my strong suit so I cannot argue the position, but I do trust him.
Yes, it seems to be a growing trend. I definitely feel it as a younger woman who has struggled to date. Louise Perry actually brings the point up in the book about the pill. On the bright side, it has helped women take control of their fertility and plan their families in a way that is healthy and sustainable. But it also gives women one less defense in saying "no" to unwanted sexual encounters. (And from personal experience, it also melts your brain.)
For a lot of couples, it's not always a great strategy overall to have both parents working. Unfortunately, modern life kind of requires it, but childcare is cartoonishly expensive, and it does cost money to go out and make money.
Obviously, I'm not saying all women should be barefoot and pregnant, but I do think we need to consider whether we all *really* want to *all* be a Fortune 500 CEO, wear powersuits and only identify as a Worker™️ when there are other aspects of life to enjoy. Feminism isn't a team sport.
I didn't plan to have children. I never thought I was capable of supporting a family. If it weren't for nature I don't think I would have ever "decided" it was time.
Once my first child was born it forced me to work harder and better myself. Being responsible for a family is a big motivator. Today I realize that I could have supported several more. There is some regret that I did not.
So when I hear folks say they cannot afford children, I understand the sentiment. I now know it's one of those "leaps of faith" that folks talk about. More often than not, fear of he unknown holds us back from being the best we can be.
As for dating, I never did that. My wife and I met in school and were friends. Our relationship grew over time. Dating almost seems too contrived to me, like there are expectations or something.
I can't really put my finger on it, but for me it has to be less formal and more casual. Anything else is just too stressful. Dating strangers seems really stressful.
Some folks are lucky and find love at first sight, but I doubt that most people do.
Welcome back!
It’s good to be back!
It must be something in the air.
Recently I ventured into the dangerous turf of discussing some downdsides of the sexual revolution on my page and in discussions elsewhere.
I've had a few women give positive feedback, and more than a few telling me to mind my own business. Very few men have the courage to enter these discussions. I try to keep it on the clinical side. As always I promote nature as the boss and our attempts to subvert the laws of nature as hazardous and usually harmful in the Long term.
No one ever discusses the side effects of birth control. I went there and I am glad I did.
One of my more controvercial points is that if there were no birth control, women and men would be much more selective when choosing a mate.
Even more outlandish is the idea that if women were more often pregnant they (and their mates) would get a break from the estrus cycle, including the dreaded PMS. Surprisingly some women liked that comment!
On the financial front, my CPA says that having both partners working is not good tax strategy. Accounting is not my strong suit so I cannot argue the position, but I do trust him.
Anyway, great to hear from you again!
Good to hear from you again as well!
Yes, it seems to be a growing trend. I definitely feel it as a younger woman who has struggled to date. Louise Perry actually brings the point up in the book about the pill. On the bright side, it has helped women take control of their fertility and plan their families in a way that is healthy and sustainable. But it also gives women one less defense in saying "no" to unwanted sexual encounters. (And from personal experience, it also melts your brain.)
For a lot of couples, it's not always a great strategy overall to have both parents working. Unfortunately, modern life kind of requires it, but childcare is cartoonishly expensive, and it does cost money to go out and make money.
Obviously, I'm not saying all women should be barefoot and pregnant, but I do think we need to consider whether we all *really* want to *all* be a Fortune 500 CEO, wear powersuits and only identify as a Worker™️ when there are other aspects of life to enjoy. Feminism isn't a team sport.
I didn't plan to have children. I never thought I was capable of supporting a family. If it weren't for nature I don't think I would have ever "decided" it was time.
Once my first child was born it forced me to work harder and better myself. Being responsible for a family is a big motivator. Today I realize that I could have supported several more. There is some regret that I did not.
So when I hear folks say they cannot afford children, I understand the sentiment. I now know it's one of those "leaps of faith" that folks talk about. More often than not, fear of he unknown holds us back from being the best we can be.
My 2 cents.
"...fear of he unknown holds us back from being the best we can be."
I couldn't agree more. That's been on my mind a lot lately.
As for dating, I never did that. My wife and I met in school and were friends. Our relationship grew over time. Dating almost seems too contrived to me, like there are expectations or something.
I can't really put my finger on it, but for me it has to be less formal and more casual. Anything else is just too stressful. Dating strangers seems really stressful.
Some folks are lucky and find love at first sight, but I doubt that most people do.